Foggy

Tonight's show was fun. It was a pretty quiet crowd, but I'm getting better at accepting the fact that a non-reactive crowd doesn't mean a displeased crowd. I had several friends and family members there, so that made me happy. I also had a surprise appearance by one of the CF doctors! One of my friends went to see him today (Hi E!) and I asked her to pass the info along to him. I didn't see him during the show, but was so excited when he was out in the cafe afterwards.

I was in the following games tonight: Emo Speed Date (changer), Buzzer Game Show (as Barbara Buchanan), Helping Hands Oscar (sitting on the lap), Foreign-Dubbed Soap Opera (as a translator), and Repeat Scene Musical Styles. I had a lot of fun with all of the games, even though my head was really foggy tonight. I think it was a combination of how lethargic I was all week, plus the prescription pain medicine. I have never found myself blanking as much as I did tonight, like completely forgetting what the last person just said, etc. I had this faint headache throughout the show - a dehydrated-like feeling. I'll say my biggest accomplishment for the night was Repeat Scene Musical Styles. I tend to lurk in the background in musical games because singing isn't my forte, but I really gave it my all tonight. We did R&B, Opera, and Rap. It was the perfect scene to end the night!

Right now I am in my childhood room.

OH! Before I forget... Yesterday I was at Starbucks and was talking to the worker as my drink was made. He commented on how nice the weather was, and I told him that it was beautiful and that I have bad allergies, so it would be a few weeks until I could actually go out and enjoy it. He was like, "I'm lucky I don't have that problem, but now I will just appreciate it more. I will breathe easy for you, my friend." Honestly it about stopped me dead in my tracks because of the words 'breathe easy.' Now, I realize they aren't the most uncommon words in the world, but I don't often hear them in reference to something other than CF. Two of my best friends have gotten those words tattooed on them in honor of me, so those words are really special to me. It was a really interesting word choice on his part and it made me shudder. In a good way.

Today I was thinking about how I really need to get back into an exercise routine. I know it's only been a few weeks and my slacking has been for mostly legitimate purposes, but I feel kind of useless lately. Not in an oh-how-depressing kind of way, but I just don't feel very strong lately. I just feel kind of 'there' and lacking some substance. I hope the way I'm describing this makes sense to someone somewhere.

Well, my car has a check-up in the morning, so I better get to sleep. I'll probably work on my laptop using wireless Internet at Nissan as it happens. This week has been weird since I haven't been at work, but I have gotten just as much accomplished telecommuting each day. So I am worn out.

Invisible

Today was a much better day, fans!! Thank you all for the support and the encouragement; I think I am on the right track to feeling better. I was feeling very sore today, but didn't have even half of the lung pain or breathing difficulty today. Woohooo! I can't tell you how relieved I am to have had a day where I felt better than worse. Forward progress is GREAT!

Speaking of progress, Drew's Crew is only $60 shy of $6K online right now, so that makes me smile! I know that we have at least $500 in checks, too, so we are probably 1/3 of the way to my big ol' goal. I got one donation and two new walkers today, so I'm excited about all of that.

My boss suggested that I stay home from work tomorrow if it will help me get back where I need to be, and I haven't yet decided whether or not to take her up on that offer. I'd kind of like to be up and about for the first day this week, buuuut my body is also radiating from the soreness right now, so we'll see how I sleep tonight. I think I remember exactly how I had the three pillows situated last night in order to minimize the pain as much as possible. Geez, I sound pitiful!

Today I had some yogurt at a place called Yogli Mogli. I got strawberry and raspberry yogurt topped with gummy bears, strawberries, kiwi, mango and pineapple. It was pretty fun, but they really ought to invest in some better quality gummy bears. For me, Drew Dotson, to throw out a gummy bear, something is horrendously wrong. The green gummy bears were absolutely awful. It got me thinking about how great Haribo gummy bears are. I learned the other day that the green Haribo bears are actually strawberry-flavored. All gummy bear companies should look into doing something like that because green is notoriously bad when it comes to candy.

Well, I guess I better get ready for bed. I mean, I've been in bed for much of the day, but I guess I better proceed as though I'll be sleeping soon. Tomorrow is going to be a big day for me whether I go to work or not - surviving an improv show when I didn't think my body would survive the week.

I am glad you are reading this.

FIGHT

Well, I ended up staying home from work today because the sleeping thing didn't work out too well last night. I was also short-of-breath, so I thought it would be best to work from home today. I was feeling decent the first few hours after waking, but my health started to gradually decline over the afternoon, and now I'm feeling probably the worst I've felt all day. I just took my second dose of the antibiotic, though, so I think it's too early to make a judgment on whether or not that's working.

One of the doctors checked in today and would like me to get admitted Friday if I'm not feeling any better. I am confident that I'll start feeling better, but I must say that my body has surprised me a bit over these last few days. Usually I feel kind of in control even when I'm out of control, but not so much in recent days. I am scheduled to be in the improv show on Thursday, so my goal is to at least hang in there for that. I know it sounds like a lot of work, but surprisingly I tend to check my health problems at the door when I walk in there. Sooo, I'm not concerned.

Today I made my squares for this CF quilt that is being auctioned off. They look kinda decent, but they also look a little child-like. The fabric markers I got this weekend were bleeding a bit on the fabric, but I think they turned out okay. I had one for Love, Peace, Beauty and Smile. I know those words don't necessarily go together, but I had to keep it to basics when I realized how the markers were working out on the fabric. Oh well... it's for charity. The paper said I could write the person's name and age and I almost put something like 'Mary, 4' to save a little face, but whatever! I don't imagine any of the other participants having much luck with the type of material we had.

I got a few donations today, so those made me smile. I think I'll have some luck in the coming days since it's almost a new month... The best thing that could come out of being hospitalized is more awareness. That'd be the light at the end of that tunnel. I really, really think I can shake this without IVs. I might try walking on the treadmill tomorrow if it seems at all feasible.

Mmm, I am looking forward to a much better day tomorrow. I think I just realized I haven't even laughed today, which is so not like me. There's a chance I laughed during a quick phone call earlier, but I remember wondering if I sounded as out-of-breath as I felt. Oh, Drewdle. Get it together.

Send any extra positive energy my way. NO! HOSPITAL! FOR! DREW!

Trial and error

Well, today was a big ol' waste of time.

As you know, I emailed the doctor in the middle of the night to try to get some sort of answer for the unusual pain I was having in my chest/lungs. Well, I got a return phone call right as I walked into an 11:00 a.m. appointment at work, so I made a quick exit. The nurse recommended that I go to the ER because the pain in my lungs was concerning and the doctor didn't have clinic hours until Thursday. Sooooooo, one of my coworkers and I headed over to the ER. Mind you, I hate the ER, so I hope that illustrates the desperation I was facing.

Upon arriving, we had to wait practically forever to check in, even though I marked chest pain and shortness-of-breath as symptoms (two of the top things to acknowledge according to the signs all over the walls). When they finally took me back to check out my vitals, my blood pressure was by far the highest it's ever been - 154/96. That's absolutely unheard of for me, but they didn't seem too concerned.

After a while, they opted to do some bloodwork and a chest x-ray. The bloodwork came back showing elevated white blood cell counts, and the chest x-ray came back looking really good. Soooo, thinking the x-ray would be the tell-tale sign of what was causing the lung pain, we were left with really no indications. However, we got one of my doctors on the phone who highly encouraged that I be admitted to the hospital, but I wasn't quite buying the argument since there aren't any symptoms that are typical of when I have a lung infection that requires IV antibiotics.

So, after spending six hours in different holding areas of the ER, I walked out with a prescription for a different, higher-dose oral antibiotic, as well as prescription pain medicine. I promptly went to Target and got my prescriptions filled and enjoyed a medicine cocktail for dinner. I'm not even sure what to think of today's colossal waste of time, but I guess it's relieving to know that they didn't see pneumonia or a collapsed lung or anything. I was honestly terrified after the way last night went.

Well, I am just ready to try to sleep. I haven't yet decided what I'll do workwise tomorrow, but I guess it will depend on if I feel well-rested after tonight. I'm happy to report that nothing seems to be overly concerning...just the usual shenanigans.

Thanks to everyone who was looking out for me today. :o) If I didn't get back to you, that's where I was - between the guy with the sliced-open hand and the perforated-bowel dude.

Mama called the doctor and the doctor said

no more monkeys jumpin' on the bed.

Well, it's Monday. Wooooooooooo. It seems like the weekend was never even here - probably because I spent a good portion of it sleeping or sitting around in bed.

I didn't have a good end to my weekend. I started to get some pretty serious chest pain yesterday afternoon, and it hasn't let up much since. It's basically right below my breastbone, but it also radiates into my right lung. I'm not sure exactly what could be causing it, but it doesn't seem digestive-related because of the time it started and the fact that it's still continuing. I ended up emailing the doctor at about 4:00 a.m. because I was up off and on throughout the night. I asked the soonest that I can be seen, so hopefully I'll be hearing something earlyish today. I can't remember if/when they have clinic hours on Mondays, but I better not put it off any longer.

My ceiling got a little work done on it yesterday and it isn't looking too far from normal, which is relieving. It's nice for there to be no more hole! Now it's a matter of sanding it down and painting it lighter to match the rest of the ceiling. It looks worlds better and makes me happy. I'm a lucky little chicken.

I've been in the midst of a donation slump, but I also realize expenses are usually tight at the end of the month. Soooo, I'm hopeful that I'll see a jump this week. When I got up during one of my middle-of-the-night shenanigans, I checked my email and saw that I had gotten a donation, so that was the shining light! I'm about 27 percent to my goal right now (online). Go, Drew, go!

Well, I hope I'll be feeling good enough to make it to rehearsal tonight. I am hopeful that, as I get going for the day, the pain will just kind of fall by the wayside and I'll be able to proceed with my day. Also, I am supposed to go to the doctor two weeks from tomorrow for a routine check-up anyway, so maybe if I can get in today, we'll call it even.

Anyway, I know I haven't said much of anything uplifting lately, but hopefully I'll have great things to say once my body decides to cooperate.

Oh, and I think I am going to PUERTO RICO!

Not myself

I've gotta say... I don't know if it's a combination of the medicines, if it's my body, if it's the allergies, or what, but I don't feel like myself at all. I am feeling extremely run-down when I haven't even done much. I'm just not keeping up with my daily activities like I was a few weeks ago. I don't know what's causing it, but I might need to make a guest appearance at the doctor soon if something doesn't improve. I'm feeling short-of-breath a lot, and I've been having some pain in my lungs when I breathe. I tried to take a nap because it was the only thing I could think of to make me forget about it, but I couldn't even fall asleep. I'm starting to feel very tired now, though, so maybe it will enable me to get a great night's sleep.

Friday was a pretty good day. My back started hurting me from the 'roided up activities I did during the improv show. I stopped at Chick-fil-A to pick something up on the way into work. I was only at work for a few hours, but I was feeling like I'd been there for days by the time I got in my car to head home. Not in an I-don't-want-to-be-here kind of way, but in an I'm-not-feeling-well kind of way. I went out to eat with my friend for dinner, and we enjoyed ourselves at Cheeseburger in Paradise. It was nice and tropical. Made me want to get to warm weather by skipping the brunt of the allergy season.

I slept for close to 11 hours last night. My mom came and got me and we went to my grandmother's house for a while. The three of us ended up going out to eat at El Toro for a sort of late lunch. My mom and I went to the mall after we finished at Gran's house, hoping to find another pair of the very inexpensive jeans that fit me pretty well, but didn't have such luck. Oh well!

When I got home, I sat around for a while reading and doing things online. Then I decided to treat myself to a bubble bath, in which I couldn't make the drain on my bathtub close for some reason. Sooo, that plan got canceled pretty quickly. I finished reading this book called Beyond Breathing a few minutes ago, and I'll probably go to sleep very soon. I'm literally running on empty. This is weird for me.

Drew's Crew is doing pretty awesome. We are at almost $5,400 online, with another $400 or so in checks. I know some truly incredible people. I also learned of a CFer that died today, so it makes me want that $20K goal so much more. Gotta keep fighting the good fight.

'Roid rage. ROOOOAAAAAR!

Hey y'all!

As you can probably assume from the title of this post, I got started on steroids today. I am really relieved because I think this is exactly what I need to get my breathing under control right now. I'm on a certain dose for five days, and then will wean off of it over 10 days if it works over the five days. I truly already feel better. I am also pretty hyperactive, but I'm tired at the same time, so I'm not sure how that works. I do wish I could have this energy all of the time.

Tonight's show was a lot of fun. The audience wasn't the biggest its ever been, but they were enthusiastic and seemed to have a good time. I had many wonderful friends and family members supporting me, so it felt awesome. Because it's my post-show ritual, I will recount the games I played... Tonight I was in Touch Collaborative Monologue (New!), Emo Interview (changer), Helping Hands Oscar (New!), Buzzer Talk Show (New!) and Musical Styles. Thanks to these 'roids, I was high-energy throughout the whole thing, which is usually the toughest part for me. Everyone was just really positive and went out there and had fun!

I decided to do a new character tonight - Barbara Buchanan. I figured there wasn't any night better than a night where I felt invincible due to medication; I was glad I went out on the limb. It was fun to try a character that was completely outrageous for a change. I tend to create characters that are 'me' with a twist. It was fun to step way outside of the box.

This morning I had set my alarm as though I was going to exercise before work. However, I ended up oversleeping by nearly an hour and a half. I was going to get up at quarter til 6:00 a.m. so that I could exercise before work. However, I heard a car honk outside and was like, "Who is honking at this hour?" Then, I looked at my phone and saw that it was 7:02 a.m. and I was supposed to leave in 40 minutes. Soooo, it was a quick morning and I threw show stuff together without rhyme or reason. Oh well, perhaps tomorrow I'll make it to the gym. And 'roid rage!

Tomorrow I'll be going into work in the afternoon because I need to be there for an appointment. I'm going to work from home probably up until lunchtime and then head over to gear up for a 3:00 p.m. meeting. After that's done, I'll probably head back to try to beat traffic on a Friday afternoon. Plus, I'm meeting a friend for dinner!

My team almost hit $5K today, so I'm pretty pumped! I got a new walker, too!

Well, Steroid Magee is headed to bed. NIGHT!

This is the most interesting part of this post

Words are seriously escaping me right now. I just hit this wall of exhaustion. I will highlight the day in bullet form...

• Drew's Crew jumped over the $4K mark today, and I smiled
• I had Chipotle for lunch (no, you've probably never read that from me...)
• I had Steak and Shake for dinner (needed onion rings)
• Tomorrow I'll be working from home, and that makes me smile again
• I will be performing on Thursday night
• Part of my ceiling got fixed today from the Great Flood 2K10
• I was short-of-breath for a lot of the day (High allergy count...correlation? Yes.)
• Sudoku is the bomb

It's time to sleep like a log.

GREAT DAY!

Today was an amazing day. I haven't felt as loved as I have in a long time as I felt today... As you all know, I've really kicked off the fundraising for the Great Strides Walk over the last few days. With the finalization of my awesome video, I felt geared up to tackle this thing, but even more so than in years past because I thought people might be more inspired than before. As a team, our total jumped nearly $1,500 today, which is incredible.

I garnered four new walkers that I'm really excited about, and just had such an outpouring of support from people - some being people I interact with regularly, others being folks I haven't seen in years. It feels really great to watch people come to the forefront to help a cause so important to me. A team that went into last weekend with about $1,300 now has at least $3,760, assuming that there's no money that hasn't yet been posted. What an awesome feeling!!! I have also appreciated everyone so much who has offered to spread the word. There is no humility in fundraising, so start your spreading! www.cff.org/great_strides/drewdotson5267

In other news (but similar, nonetheless), I was short of breath for most of the day. Today has been crazy in that, when I left for work, it was snowing. The high was seriously near 70 on Saturday, and today it's snowing? Crazy talk. I'm not sure what's up, but I woke up coughing a lot last night. It made for a difficult night's sleep, but I was able to stay energized all day anyway because each donation is like a new adrenaline rush. Kinda dorky, I know, but I love it!

Today was also great because I found out I was approved for a second telecommute day each week, so starting NOW, I'll be working from home on Wednesdays and Fridays of each week. I really think this will make a world of difference to me. As I make pretty evident, there's so much I want to do, but maintaining my health is very important as well, so this enables me to spend some more time focusing on my health, which in turns buys time back into the day. Woooooo!

Finally, I'll just end on rehearsal, which was fun. I was glad to have the early rehearsal or I'd still be there now. I was a little concerned going into it because I haven't been facing the short-of-breath issue much in my improv career, and it makes it very difficult to stay out of your head when you're conscious of your breathing. Amazingly, though, I was able to forget about it for the duration of rehearsal.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand, on that note, I'll go to sleep. I may pull an early shift tomorrow at work so that I can get home and get a lot of rest to help with this...issue.

Run, Dora, Ruuuun

Right now my sister should be finishing the ING half-marathon on Team 65 Roses. She raised over $1,000! I haven't been awake for long, but it looks like the rain might have held off so far, so my fingers are crossed. Claire's going to text me when she knows what time they'll be at breakfast because I'm going to meet them. I tried to find the place's menu online like the dork that I am, but I can't find it. I guess I'll have to be surprised and select from the menu like normal people do.

Yesterday was a pretty nice and relaxing day. The weather was beautiful, but unfortunately for me that means to stay inside at this time of year. My allergies have been killing me this weekend - keeping me short of breath more often than not. I'm hoping that this rain that starts AFTER the half-marathon will wash some of it away.

I met my old boss (most recent one!) at Starbucks yesterday, and it was great to catch up with her. She's moving to Philly on Thursday, so we wanted one last rendezvous before she left. I'm sure we'll keep in touch as much as we have here, but it's weird knowing she'll be so far away.

Well, yesterday was an awesome day fundraising-wise. My aunt and one of my cousins signed up to join Drew's Crew, so that makes me happy. We raised about $400 yesterday. I just calculated that, to make my $20,000 goal, we need to raise about $327 every day up until the day of the walk. When I look at it that way, it's a little scary, but WE WILL DO OUR BEST! Actually, when I divide that between the team members, it's not that much. Goooooo Drew's Crew! For those of you walking in late, visit www.drewdotson.com/p/walk-for-cf.html.

Yesterday evening I went to Publix in my reindeer pajama pants because I was feeling very thirsty. I mean, I didn't wear the reindeer pants because I was thirsty; I went because I was thirsty. I got an 8-pack of Gatorade and a gallon of milk. I know I looked like a nut, but hopefully people thought I must not be feeling well or something.

It's been quite a while since I accomplished anything bookwise, but I think about it often. It's the thought that counts... Maybe that will be my goal for the day when I return from eating my yet-to-be-determined breakfast.

It's raining men

So, last night's improv show was fun AND sold out. My parents came, and were in the front row, so no pressure there... I was in Emo Date as the changer, Sounds Like A Song (first time), Buzzer and Oscar Musical. I was slightly concerned during download when I found out I'd be in two singing games considering the hoarseness and what not, but it's subsided a lot and I'm feeling almost back to normal. I didn't notice it in the first singing game, but I definitely did in the second because I was Musicaled right after I was Oscared, so my throat was RAW!

When I walked into my empty house after the show, I heard a weird sound; it sounded almost like crackling. I flipped on the light, terrified that something was on fire. I headed toward the corner of the living room where I heard the sound, then felt the water drip on me. I looked up and water was dripping from several areas of the ceiling, mainly in the shape of a rectangle. I ran upstairs and my bathroom was flooded. The water was all the way out onto the carpet in my bedroom. I mean, it was a LOT of water.

I majorly started freaking out and putting towels down, getting containers to put on the floor downstairs, etc. I ended up spending almost two hours moving furniture, soaking up water, etc. And, to top it all off, I got a blood-drawing papercut. I unplugged something from an outlet and it had one of those plasticy-paper tags warning you about electricity and as I pulled the plug out from the wall, I papercut the palm of my hand, right above the thumb crease. Perhaps they should add that to the warning tag. The cut seriously consumed enough of my attention that I lost focus on the fact that the ceiling was about to fall down.

Today I woke up and wasn't as upset. I went downstairs and, while part of the ceiling will need replacing, it looked much better today. There haven't been any drips all day. My resident handyman came over and tore some of the drywall down - about an eight square foot area. Now there's just a gaping hole in the living room ceiling, but at least the wood is drying out. I love being a homeowner!

Well, I'm really tired because I was up until 3:00 a.m. I got up and worked for a while this morning and then had to take the afternoon off to tend to the house. I'm really relieved that it seems like it's going to be minor, or at least people are good at lying to me to make me feel better.

I have already gotten several donations for the CF walk, so I'm really excited.

Cheers to a lazy weekend!

Because you're an insider...

First, I want to say one thing that I forgot to say last night when recounting the choking-of-the-baby story that left me up in arms...

Yesterday morning when I was walking back from the gym, I stopped by my mailbox per a friend's gentle request. There was a little envelope from a good friend and inside was a Starbucks gift card! She said it was a little "just because" after seeing me talk about it so much in my blog. How sweet is that?! It started my day off right, and I'm still excited about it! If I can get ready fast enough, it might get a swipe today!

Now, drumroll, the moment we've all been waiting for...

Since you've probably been following this CF video journey since its beginning, it's time for the unveiling of the 98%-completed video. I'm not crazy about the way it's sitting on the page, but I didn't want to make you patient souls wait a moment longer!

ARE YOU READY TO SEE THIS?!

It takes a village

Today I went out to eat at El Azteca and was watching a boy (about 8-10 years old) hold a baby sitting at a nearby table. The table was very chaotic and had multiple families, several young children, etc. I was very surprised the parents were letting him hold the baby because he was NOT doing a good job. Watching it was extremely anxiety-provoking because it looked like he was going to drop the baby. He then started shaking the baby, and the parents asked him to stop, but let him continue to hold the baby. Then, I looked over and he was putting the stick of his lollipop into the baby's ear, which made me cringe, but he took it out almost immediately.

This whole time I couldn't take my eyes off the boy and the baby - like I was watching a trainwreck. I noticed the boys hands were around the baby's neck and the baby looked to be straining and her face started turning red. Although this is not my typical behavior, I had to get up and go over to the table at this point. I told one of the men at the table that I really didn't think the boy should be holding the baby because I had been watching and saw him put his hands around the baby's neck. The man actually said to me that he was just playing with her, so I told him that the boy also stuck a lollipop stick into the baby's ear. The man was slightly rude, and I said that I was watching and would not have gotten up if I was not very concerned with what I saw, especially when the baby's face turned red with the boy's hands around the baby's neck.

I sat down feeling kind of embarrassed because I didn't mean to step on anybody's toes, but it was awful to see. It turned out that the man I was telling was not the father of either child, but the father was across from him and heard me voicing concern. The father then went and took the baby away from the boy. A little while later, a lady from the group came up to me and thanked me. I thanked her for letting me know because I wasn't trying to upset anyone. She told me that it takes a village, and that she was glad that I came over to say something. I turned maroon, but I was glad she said something because I was feeling like maybe I had crossed a line.

ANYWAY!

Happy St. Patrick's Day! I forgot to wear green. I had my first improv show a year ago today. Awwww....

Speaking of, I am in the show tomorrow night, so I'm looking forward to that, even though it's been a long week. I wouldn't mind if my character, Rebecca Miller, made her first appearance in a show, especially with her newly acquired Goodwill outfit.

It's past my bedtime, so I'm going to sleep. The video is getting uploaded TONIGHT, and I'm not even yanking your chain one bit!

Change=on the horizon

Woooooooooooooooo! It's Tuesday!

Well, I am not very excited to be awake and getting ready for work, for no other reason than I'm tired as all get out. I had a difficult time sleeping last night, and laid down for bed late after a late rehearsal anyway. I got maybe six hours of sleep, but they weren't uninterrupted. And I did have a dream involving some female friends trying to kill each other with their bare hands, one stabbing people with needles with an unknown liquid in the syringe. YAY! Things must be all warm and fuzzy inside for me!

I had a ton of fun on Sunday. I got to catch up with two people I hadn't seen in a long time - one being a close friend from childhood, and the other being a friend I knew from a previous workplace. It was a lot of fun just chatting about life (little life and big life) and enjoying some delicious food. Ahhh, if only every day could be spent yapping with good people!

Yesterday was pretty good for a Monday! I mean, I don't remember much about it, so that had to have been good. I'm still hoarse, but I'm not in pain in any way. I don't know yet if these antibiotics are working. They've been upsetting my stomach a bit, but well-tolerated overall. It's about time I pop one of those suckers off.

Rehearsal was... different. I practiced dialects for the first time, which was quite the experience. I think it helped that I was pretty tired before I arrived because I think that lowered my inhibitions and acknowledgement of the discomfort I probably felt. Anyway, it was a pretty good exercise and it was a big step for me considering it's not something that has ever made me excited.

Well, I'm gonna hurry to get ready so I can treat myself to Starbucks. I'm bummed because I have a late meeting at work today, so I didn't get to do my usual early Tuesday. Maybe it's a blessing since I didn't sleep well, but it'd be nice to get home before 7-something. That'll all be irrelevant when I get my hands on that Dark Cherry Mocha!

Have a swell day.

Get outta my dreams

Well, good morning. Let us all give a moment of silence to the hour of sleep we lost last night. ARGH!

Mm, so I am writing because a particular dream has me feeling a little jarred this morning. You know when there are certain things in your waking life you really don't want to think about, and then they find a way of making you think about them anyway by subconsciously inserting themselves into your dreams? Yep, that's the story of my most recent dream.

This dream was honestly just weird. I basically dreamt that I got home and a lot of familiar people were in my house. I walked into the kitchen and the refrigerator was gone and there was some significant structural damage to the walls, but no parts of the fridge anywhere. I asked someone where the refrigerator went and the person explained to me that it exploded because of something involving pressure, jargon, blah blah blah. It was just odd because, even though the fridge had vanished into thin air, we were happy to see each other and it was kind of sweet for a short minute. The end.

Somehow in this same string of dreams, a colleague had been planning things on the wrong dates because she was looking at a calendar for 2011.

And, while I'm on the topic of dreams, let me mention the one from Thursday night, I believe. I had a dream that I traded my car in to get a beat up, old, red SUV, which would not have been a smart choice because I didn't get any money in return. Then, though, I was at my parents' house and noticed that someone had parked my car literally up against (side-by-side) another car, where there would probably be no way to move the car without damaging it much more. Somehow I go do something else and come back, find that the car is gone, and my mom tells me she's sorry, but the car was totaled and they did away with it. I was crying, talking about how I couldn't get anywhere, and my mom showed no remorse. I woke up as I was bawling, trying to figure out how I would get to work and improv without a car. Weird.

So, off of dreams and onto reality...

The Dark Cherry Mocha was a good choice. I won't act like it was the best thing I've ever had a taste of or anything, but it was good and fun. It was a nice change of pace with a fun kick to it. It must have helped me get through the night because I don't recall ever thinking about how tired I was.

I started losing my voice yesterday afternoon and, by nighttime, it was practically gone. I haven't spoken yet today to see if it's still messed up, but I just said 'hello' to myself and it's definitely not at its full potential. I also lost my voice on Wednesday, so I tried to look at my dorky pollen alerts to see if there was something in common that might have triggered it. Then I saw that I didn't get one on Wednesday because the pollen level wasn't high enough, so I got confused and gave up.

OH! Yesterday I went to the gym for the first time in a week after the allergy shenanigans. I ran two miles and then walked a third, which was pretty good. I didn't know how I'd handle it with the allergies, the antibiotic making me groggy, etc. But I trucked on through!

I better shut up and get dressed because I have a friend coming over at 12:30 p.m. Then, at 5:00 p.m. I am meeting another friend to discuss health history for a study she's doing. Here I come, Sunday!

This post is me psyching myself up

Woooooooooo! Wooooooohooooooooooooo! I am so energized!

I have to be in Midtown in about an hour, and I'm extremely tired, but at the end of this post, I will be ENERGYFIED!

On the way, I plan to go to Starbucks and try the newest thing that caught my fancy - the Dark Cherry Mocha. I tried to get it a week or so ago, but they said they didn't have it yet. I am excited to try it because I think it's exactly the potion I need.

Tonight's gonna be a long one at the theatre... I start at 6:30 and will probably get to leave around 1:00 or 1:30 a.m., which will kinda be 2:00 or 2:30 a.m. given the time change. DON'T FORGET TO CHANGE YOUR CLOCKS! We're so inundated with technology that most clocks will just change for us, but in case you're confused...

I think that's about all I have to say. There's definitely more I could say, but the longer I type, the more hectic it will be trying to make it to the theatre on time, and we all know I can't sacrifice that Dark Cherry Mocha I just swooned over.

ENERGY! ENERGY! ENERGY!

Revolution's not easy

Man, I know I should be sleeping, but I am feeling so energized right now. I spent the last several hours dictating (ha!) changes to my fundraising video, and I am really excited to share it with everyone. There are still a few things to make it absolutely perfect, but I am rowdy! Gosh, it is awesome! I sure hope the anticipation is building...

So, I am really excited about reading Eat, Pray, Love, but I haven't gotten around to it today. I'll definitely spend some time reading this weekend. Last night I started reading it to help wind down for bed, but I ended up feeling rejuvenated instead. When I turned off the lights, I kept thinking about how I wanted to read some more. That being said, I can't wait to have some free time to read this weekend.

Well, I finally talked to the nurse today... at about 4:30 p.m., so I was getting pretty impatient. The doctor decided to put me on a 21-day course of Bactrim (oral antibiotic) two times a day. That's definitely better than being in the hospital, but I will stand by my case that we are overreacting. However, if this potentially gets me into the study sooner when I get my lung function numbers back up, then that's what I'll do. I popped my first pill this evening and nothing too weird happened, so hopefully I'll be side effect free! I think the recent onslaught of rain has also helped alleviate some of my sinus issues.

I did awesome at the dentist this morning, but I've always been pretty good at getting good reports at the dentist. The guy wasn't playing around with those pokey things, but I got nothing short of compliments on my grill. I'm going back September 16. I am writing it here for when I start wondering when my next appointment is...

What else? I emailed more than 52,000 people at work today, so I hope somebody found something useful. If not, oh well. I feel accomplished.

Tomorrow evening I am meeting my most recent boss to catch up before she moves to Philadelphia. Sad day, but I'm happy for her.

Saturday night I am pulling a DOUBLE at the theatre. As much as I've enjoyed having some time off this week, I'm definitely eager to get back there.

It's probably time for bed. I really want to read some, but I don't want to get even more hyper than I already am.

Eat, Pray, Love

Well, I have a dentist's appointment this morning. I am not really looking forward to it, but I'm not exactly dreading it either. The dentist is something I could take or leave and I wouldn't care much either way.

Yesterday was an interesting day. Around 2:30 p.m., I got an email from the study guy to get me up-to-speed. He basically told me that, while he doesn't think that Tuesday's shenanigans will necessarily exclude me from the study, he did talk to my doctor and she wants to 'treat' me. Mind you I never saw my regular doctor on Tuesday. The study guy told me that the doctor or physician's assistant would call me to get me started. However, that didn't happen yesterday. By the end of the day, I decided to give them a call, but did not succeed. I'm not sure if 'treating' me involves a course of antibiotics, whether those would be oral or IV, etc. I guess I shall find out today.

I was coughing kind of a lot, but it was a dry, hacky cough - the kind that results in almost losing your voice. By the end of the day, my voice was really scratchy, which is completely different from the kinds of symptoms I get when it's a CF-related problem. Anyway, I will take what the doctor says into consideration, but we don't need to get all out-of-hand here; this happens to me every year as the weather starts to change.

Despite how I was feeling, I ended up meeting a friend for dinner at Tin Drum. Let me tell you that this was a great decision. I got this sweet and sour stir-fry, and will be enjoying the leftovers for lunch. Anyway, I saw my friend Karen that I hadn't seen since 2008, and it was really nice to see her again. We talked about everything under the sun, and that's why I like about her most. We have a connection... not in a romantic way. (HA!) She told me I should really read "Eat, Pray, Love."

After we finished eating, I knew it was time for me to head home and get to bed, but I instead went to Target to get the book. I am working on being quick-to-action (not in a rash way - in a non-procrastination way). I ended up getting the book, a cute t-shirt, a black zip-up sweater type thing, and a prescription. I consider it successful.

I gotta hurry and get ready so I can go 'get my tooth' on at the dentist.

Not. My. Day.

Well, as indicated by the title of this blog, I'm not in the best mood I've ever experienced.

First off, I can't believe I posted this morning; that seems like it was three days ago, but I guess time drags when you're NOT having fun. Welcome melodrama.

So, this morning started off fine. I went to work and what not, per usual. Well, I had meetings that began at 9:00 a.m. and lasted until I needed to leave for the doctor, which wasn't exactly the ideal way to spend the half-day I had in the office. Granted, the meetings had to happen, but I would have loved to have spent the four hours doing solid work.

I then went to the CF center to begin the screen for the drug study. Within 30 minutes of my arrival, I was pretty disappointed. I don't know if I went into much depth on my last doctor's appointment blog post, but at my appointment in January, I recorded the highest lung function numbers I've gotten in quite some time. Well, today was a stark contrast.

Honestly, when the numbers first appeared on the computer screen, I was thinking something must be horribly wrong. I mean, these were worse than hospital numbers. By the time I completed the tests with enough consistency to be accepted, I was only down about 6 percent, but that's a lot in the CF world - especially when it means .2 liters of air.

Then, when it came time for the physical exam, the doctor looked at my lung function numbers and was surprised at the decline. She then completed the rest of the exam and looked at my nose, at which point she was impressed by the significance of the inflammation. She then started inquiring about my last sinus surgery, which wasn't exactly something I was imagining to hear at this study screening visit.

At the end of it all - after the lung function tests, bloodwork, ECGs (two), sweat tests, etc. - I don't even know if I'll qualify. With my lung numbers being as low as they are right now, the doctors definitely wouldn't consider me to be at a 'stable' point as far as my lung health. I've got my fingers crossed that we can wait it out until the end of allergy season and that I won't have gotten disqualified for my out-of-the-ordinary numbers today. If I don't get to participate, I will be very, very disappointed. I have been following this particular drug since 2006. Plus, regardless of whether I get the real drug or the placebo, study participants get to enroll in an extension study, in which I would be eligible to take the drug until it gets approved and marketed by the FDA. PLEASE! LET ME BE INCLUDED!

Anyway, talking about it isn't going to change what happened today, so I should probably just sleep it off. I went to eat Mexican at El Azteca in order to boost my mood, and it definitely helped. It's time to sleep again. My aching face just can't get enough sleep these days.

Alllllllergies

So, this allergy thing isn't faring too well for me yet this year. I have literally limited my outside time to running to and from the car, and haven't had any luck yet. Sunday night I had to forego a theatre-related opportunity because it was taking place outside, which didn't sound like a good use of time. I ended up trying to go to bed pretty early, but had a difficult time going to sleep because laying down was making me cough more.

Yesterday I got up and went into work early, knowing that, with allergies like this, they tend to elevate as the day continues... I was in the building by 7:30 a.m. and got started on the million mass emails I need to get done this week. Supposedly there was a middle-aged man stranger roaming the building carrying a big duffle bag. It's weird because, at the time, it was only me and a lady from another department in the building. I doubt it was anything to be concerned about and I didn't see the man myself, but the cops came and what not. These are the kinds of bad things that happen when I get to work early.

I went to Willy's for lunch, hoping that eating would help rid me of some of my allergy-in-the-face pain, but it didn't quite work as planned. By about 1:30 p.m., I couldn't take it anymore and headed home to work the remainder of the day from bed. I swung by the post office to pick up a piece of certified mail from my incompetent homeowners association, telling me that my doorknobs were brass. As much as I wanted to send the nastiest email known to man, I kindly emailed the property manager and said, as you know, this issue was corrected on December 6. Please do not mail me anything else. Or I will slap you silly.

After I finished up working, I dozed off just before 5:00 p.m. for what turned into a three-hour nap. I'm not sure at which point a nap becomes sleeping, but it sure was a doozie. I got up for about an hour and a half or two and then went back to sleep. I am a sleeping machine.

Today I go for the screen for my research study. I'm not exactly sure what it will entail, but I imagine I'll do a pulmonary function test and some other random test. It's supposed to take several hours, so I took the afternoon off. I hope my allergy issues don't jack this up.

HAPPY TUESDAY.